Substack is a one-room schoolhouse, and Robert F. Graboyes is the older student showing us important things, and at the same time showing us how joyful it is to see the world anew in the light of those things. Even when the subject matter is dismal, reading Graboyes you come away with some understanding, and that understanding can give birth to a brighter vision for the future. Well done Robert.
It does not reach quite as far back into the past as "The Abernathy Boys" but since you mentioned your lifelong interest in aviation, you might like "Flight of Passage" by Rinker Buck. It is the true story of how Rinker and his brother Kern, then aged 15 and 17, bought and restored a Piper PA-11 Cub Special and flew it across the country. This occurred in the summer of 1966, although Rinker did not write the book until over 30 years later, after he had become a journalist and had children of his own.
Excellent piece! I wasn't as adventurous as the Abernathy's, but in the late 1960/early 1970s, my parents let me explore without real constraint. Of course, I walked a couple of miles to school (and worked a newspaper route), explored railway stations, got up mischief in the park, and so on. It's sad how regimented children are these days.
Thank you. I find your two main ingredients plausible. I’m inclined to add at least a dollop of Marx. But with or without “my” soupçon, you have sussed out the “recipe”for today’s chaos. Nobel’s brew😢
Oh, and I think there is a dollop of Marx hidden in the essay. On Prussian schooling, I quote Gatto: “As this practice matured, the insights of Fabian socialism were stirred into the mix; gradually a socialist leveling through practices pioneered in Bismarck's Prussia came to be seen as the most efficient control system for the masses, the bottom 80 percent of the population in advanced industrial states.” And progenitors of the utopian urban design movements certainly were influenced my Marx. Indirect dollops, admittedly.
Your article is timely for a couple of reasons. Funny how the culture around you insulates you from the harm you can do with the best of intentions.
I'll have to give serious thought to how I leash my 8 year old boy. We are fortunate to live outside a small town, near his uncles farm. So I may be able to loosen the leash considerably. My 4 year old girl is a little more problematic - but her brother is leading the way.
Since I'll be venturing into teaching a masters level class in a few weeks it will be interesting to see if I run into the same toxic fragility. I have no tolerance for 'micro-aggressions' - it is abhorrent to teach a young person to examine each interaction with another person for minor slights - looking to expand their victimhood. Someone is actually paying for that education? Who would hire such damaged goods? Since it is not my career or a source of significant income, I can afford to be somewhat flexible and outright aggressive in my reaction. Time will tell.
One can only hope that the damage is not so extensive that repair is possible. Perhaps the home-schoolers are making the correct choice.
Big decisions. And it's made more difficult by social pressure. When our son was coming along, we probably would allowed him a bit more leeway to roam, except that no one else's kids seemed to be roaming.
I stumbled upon this essay from a comment of yours on another Substack. I homeschooled my daughter, now 38, for many of the reasons you talk about here. John Gatto’s book came out during that time. His commentary, along with John Holt, Ivan Illich, Helen and Mark Hegener, Linda Dobson, and others, solidified my resolve to continue homeschooling. Many of these people became my friends. We were Unschoolers. When my daughter was in her teens, she had a lot of difficulty relating to her peers. At first I worried, but then I realized she had trouble understanding her peers relationship with the world around them. She always gravitated toward older people, and surprisingly to me, young children. As a teen, she once said to me "older people live in reality, and little kids have their own reality. People my age believe what they’re told." I never questioned my decision to homeschool after she said that. This was so nice to read and brought tears to my eyes.
I'm not sure the lack of space fully explains why parents regimented after-school activities. When I query, it seems people feel there is more "danger" in today's world. This seems to be attributed to people.
I think we could make the argument that the % of "bad" people hasn't changed. The change is now we know about it because of modern media. Radio and then TV gave the first exposure but in controlled amounts of time the evening news. But we learned about kidnappings and serial killers. Things we wouldn't know unless it was local. Now we have the 24/7 of internet and cable TV so we see it all the time - giving the feeling it is more prevalent. Hence the kids need to be protected.
Adding Cronkite is a great suggestion. :) There’s a big social pressure aspect to it. When everyone let their kids roam, now and then, something bad happened, and everyone said, “What a shame.” Once the Great Cloistering got underway, the social dynamic changed. If you resisted the trend, you were scorned as negligent. And if something happened to your kid because you were continuing to allow him or her to roam, then you would be hated and excommunicated from society. So even people who wanted to leave things as they were had a difficult time doing so. Ultimately, the whole thing got validated by child protection laws and enforced by social services agencies.
My memories are similar but in a different setting. Fifties and sixties in a major east coast city. Left alone with subway fare to go anywhere. All without a cell phone to track my location or call me home. Without even a watch to self regulate the day. Not all exploration is rural.
Sometimes I think that over the last fifty or so years we, or someones unknown to us, have made a series of small decisions about life and culture that in the aggregate, have created a population of mental and physical sheep waiting to be told how to live and what to think.
It was frightening to me how quickly the COVID narrative was accepted. What comes next?
To your wonderful Lagniappe I would add "Canoeing with the Cree," Eric Sevareid's account of his and a friend's canoe trek from Minneapolis to Hudson Bay the summer after graduating high school. Quoting the Amazon review, "Without benefit of radio, motor, or good maps, the teenagers made their way over 2,250 miles of rivers, lakes, and difficult portages. Nearly four months later, after shooting hundreds of sets of rapids and surviving exceedingly bad conditions and even worse advice, the ragged, hungry adventurers arrived in York Factory on Hudson Bay--with winter freeze-up on their heels." I still shake my head in wonderment that their parents' consent seemed almost matter-of-fact.
Thanks, Mark. I didn't know about Sevareid's youthful adventures, though they don't surprise me. I went to a Thanksgiving dinner in 1979 with a friend. Didn't know anyone else there. One of the attendees gave us a slide show. He and his friends had gone by canoe from deep in the Northwest Territories to the Bering Sea somewhere near Nome. Lots of breathtaking slides, but I remember two in particular. One was the guy showing us the slides portaging--after having torn his Achille's Tendon in half. Excruciating pain, but someone had to carry the canoe, and, as with Sevareid, no radios, doctors, towns, for hundreds of miles. He just did it. And second, some of the slides looked damaged--as if they had been splattered with droplets of paint or something. In fact, those were gigantic mosquitoes dotting the pictures.
Fascinating article. It makes me think back fifty-five and sixty years ago to my own childhood. Walking the beach of Long Island's Great South Bay, combing the sand for whatever artifact that might have washed up. This was a central feature of that childhood, whether with a friend or alone; perhaps, like a faint signal from space, we searched for life outside our own. It was far more intriguing than Gilligan's Island. – Glenn Perlman
My wife grew up in Far Rockaway, and the beach there had the same impact on her. It was a central part of her existence. She’s an artist, and it shows in her works. Example: https://asgraboyesart.com/2021/11/28/moonrise/
Wonderful. I think you have nailed it: children who are never challenged never get to grow up.
But I'm more or less your age, and of course schooled in the bell-ringing, class-changing regimen. (I can actually remember thinking it was cool and high-schooly to change classes in sixth grade.) But: from then through college, there were innumerable discussions and arguments interrupted by the bell, and rarely continued in the next meeting, despite promises by the teacher/professor. I can only imagine an academic life independent of a clock.
I once applied for a professorship where students took one or two classes at a time, five days a week, for a month or so. Intense focus, and then move on. At college, I took courses in the summer like that. I liked them much better, and my grades were much higher.
Substack is a one-room schoolhouse, and Robert F. Graboyes is the older student showing us important things, and at the same time showing us how joyful it is to see the world anew in the light of those things. Even when the subject matter is dismal, reading Graboyes you come away with some understanding, and that understanding can give birth to a brighter vision for the future. Well done Robert.
You have made my evening with this comment. Thanks!
Fully deserved. I am cross-posting this one. I feel obligated to my readers to expose them to your writing.
Thanks ever so much! Hope some of them will subscribe.
It does not reach quite as far back into the past as "The Abernathy Boys" but since you mentioned your lifelong interest in aviation, you might like "Flight of Passage" by Rinker Buck. It is the true story of how Rinker and his brother Kern, then aged 15 and 17, bought and restored a Piper PA-11 Cub Special and flew it across the country. This occurred in the summer of 1966, although Rinker did not write the book until over 30 years later, after he had become a journalist and had children of his own.
I'll look it up! Thanks. Sounds great.
Excellent piece! I wasn't as adventurous as the Abernathy's, but in the late 1960/early 1970s, my parents let me explore without real constraint. Of course, I walked a couple of miles to school (and worked a newspaper route), explored railway stations, got up mischief in the park, and so on. It's sad how regimented children are these days.
Indeed! It's a pleasure to look back on.
Thank you. I find your two main ingredients plausible. I’m inclined to add at least a dollop of Marx. But with or without “my” soupçon, you have sussed out the “recipe”for today’s chaos. Nobel’s brew😢
Oh, and I think there is a dollop of Marx hidden in the essay. On Prussian schooling, I quote Gatto: “As this practice matured, the insights of Fabian socialism were stirred into the mix; gradually a socialist leveling through practices pioneered in Bismarck's Prussia came to be seen as the most efficient control system for the masses, the bottom 80 percent of the population in advanced industrial states.” And progenitors of the utopian urban design movements certainly were influenced my Marx. Indirect dollops, admittedly.
Thanks!
Your article is timely for a couple of reasons. Funny how the culture around you insulates you from the harm you can do with the best of intentions.
I'll have to give serious thought to how I leash my 8 year old boy. We are fortunate to live outside a small town, near his uncles farm. So I may be able to loosen the leash considerably. My 4 year old girl is a little more problematic - but her brother is leading the way.
Since I'll be venturing into teaching a masters level class in a few weeks it will be interesting to see if I run into the same toxic fragility. I have no tolerance for 'micro-aggressions' - it is abhorrent to teach a young person to examine each interaction with another person for minor slights - looking to expand their victimhood. Someone is actually paying for that education? Who would hire such damaged goods? Since it is not my career or a source of significant income, I can afford to be somewhat flexible and outright aggressive in my reaction. Time will tell.
One can only hope that the damage is not so extensive that repair is possible. Perhaps the home-schoolers are making the correct choice.
Big decisions. And it's made more difficult by social pressure. When our son was coming along, we probably would allowed him a bit more leeway to roam, except that no one else's kids seemed to be roaming.
I stumbled upon this essay from a comment of yours on another Substack. I homeschooled my daughter, now 38, for many of the reasons you talk about here. John Gatto’s book came out during that time. His commentary, along with John Holt, Ivan Illich, Helen and Mark Hegener, Linda Dobson, and others, solidified my resolve to continue homeschooling. Many of these people became my friends. We were Unschoolers. When my daughter was in her teens, she had a lot of difficulty relating to her peers. At first I worried, but then I realized she had trouble understanding her peers relationship with the world around them. She always gravitated toward older people, and surprisingly to me, young children. As a teen, she once said to me "older people live in reality, and little kids have their own reality. People my age believe what they’re told." I never questioned my decision to homeschool after she said that. This was so nice to read and brought tears to my eyes.
What a wonderful observation from your daughter! I’ll remember that. Glad the article touched you. More articles where that came from. :)
I'm not sure the lack of space fully explains why parents regimented after-school activities. When I query, it seems people feel there is more "danger" in today's world. This seems to be attributed to people.
I think we could make the argument that the % of "bad" people hasn't changed. The change is now we know about it because of modern media. Radio and then TV gave the first exposure but in controlled amounts of time the evening news. But we learned about kidnappings and serial killers. Things we wouldn't know unless it was local. Now we have the 24/7 of internet and cable TV so we see it all the time - giving the feeling it is more prevalent. Hence the kids need to be protected.
Maybe we add Walter Cronkite to your list?
Adding Cronkite is a great suggestion. :) There’s a big social pressure aspect to it. When everyone let their kids roam, now and then, something bad happened, and everyone said, “What a shame.” Once the Great Cloistering got underway, the social dynamic changed. If you resisted the trend, you were scorned as negligent. And if something happened to your kid because you were continuing to allow him or her to roam, then you would be hated and excommunicated from society. So even people who wanted to leave things as they were had a difficult time doing so. Ultimately, the whole thing got validated by child protection laws and enforced by social services agencies.
My memories are similar but in a different setting. Fifties and sixties in a major east coast city. Left alone with subway fare to go anywhere. All without a cell phone to track my location or call me home. Without even a watch to self regulate the day. Not all exploration is rural.
Sometimes I think that over the last fifty or so years we, or someones unknown to us, have made a series of small decisions about life and culture that in the aggregate, have created a population of mental and physical sheep waiting to be told how to live and what to think.
It was frightening to me how quickly the COVID narrative was accepted. What comes next?
My Dad grew up in Philly in the 1910s and 1920s. My recollection of his stories match what you say.
To your wonderful Lagniappe I would add "Canoeing with the Cree," Eric Sevareid's account of his and a friend's canoe trek from Minneapolis to Hudson Bay the summer after graduating high school. Quoting the Amazon review, "Without benefit of radio, motor, or good maps, the teenagers made their way over 2,250 miles of rivers, lakes, and difficult portages. Nearly four months later, after shooting hundreds of sets of rapids and surviving exceedingly bad conditions and even worse advice, the ragged, hungry adventurers arrived in York Factory on Hudson Bay--with winter freeze-up on their heels." I still shake my head in wonderment that their parents' consent seemed almost matter-of-fact.
Thanks, Mark. I didn't know about Sevareid's youthful adventures, though they don't surprise me. I went to a Thanksgiving dinner in 1979 with a friend. Didn't know anyone else there. One of the attendees gave us a slide show. He and his friends had gone by canoe from deep in the Northwest Territories to the Bering Sea somewhere near Nome. Lots of breathtaking slides, but I remember two in particular. One was the guy showing us the slides portaging--after having torn his Achille's Tendon in half. Excruciating pain, but someone had to carry the canoe, and, as with Sevareid, no radios, doctors, towns, for hundreds of miles. He just did it. And second, some of the slides looked damaged--as if they had been splattered with droplets of paint or something. In fact, those were gigantic mosquitoes dotting the pictures.
Wonderful piece
Thanks!
Fascinating article. It makes me think back fifty-five and sixty years ago to my own childhood. Walking the beach of Long Island's Great South Bay, combing the sand for whatever artifact that might have washed up. This was a central feature of that childhood, whether with a friend or alone; perhaps, like a faint signal from space, we searched for life outside our own. It was far more intriguing than Gilligan's Island. – Glenn Perlman
My wife grew up in Far Rockaway, and the beach there had the same impact on her. It was a central part of her existence. She’s an artist, and it shows in her works. Example: https://asgraboyesart.com/2021/11/28/moonrise/
Wonderful. I think you have nailed it: children who are never challenged never get to grow up.
But I'm more or less your age, and of course schooled in the bell-ringing, class-changing regimen. (I can actually remember thinking it was cool and high-schooly to change classes in sixth grade.) But: from then through college, there were innumerable discussions and arguments interrupted by the bell, and rarely continued in the next meeting, despite promises by the teacher/professor. I can only imagine an academic life independent of a clock.
I once applied for a professorship where students took one or two classes at a time, five days a week, for a month or so. Intense focus, and then move on. At college, I took courses in the summer like that. I liked them much better, and my grades were much higher.
Wait. Who is "young Evans"?
THANKS!!!! Young Ed (from the previous paragraph). Fixed now.